I’ve been working on this thing for the past little while and this is the music I’ve been listening to while I work on it and maybe you will enjoy these musics. JUST ONE IMPORTANT NOTE you have to skip the deadmau5 track at 2:50. That’s just a rule. OK have a great weekend.
What an uncannily timed question!
I’ve both been the depressed person and the person trying to give advice to the depressed person so frequently, I know that the things not to say drastically outweigh the things to say, so know that I know that all of this should be taken with a grain of salt. Everyone’s brains work differently. Everyone places different amounts of emotional/chemical weight in different stimuli or deprivations.
That said, I’ve never found it very productive to make “happy” the goal. “Functional” is a much less subjective goal, and oftentimes happiness is a cool side effect.
For me, going outside and getting vitamin D and sweating has a great deal of psychosomatic benefit. When I am in a bad bout of depression it feels like an actual substance or mass inside of me, and if I can distract myself with activities that make me feel like I am getting rid of it, it’s actually pretty helpful. A lot of it has to be a visualization, a trick you play on yourself. It’s sort of my bastardized version of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, the only kind of therapy that ever really changed my thinking about depression. If I address my depression with a lot of drinking and other forms of misbehavior, part of me knows I am play-acting depression and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. You become a cartoon of a person drinking alone and Gchatting dark things to your friends with the specific intent to make them worry, and that’s cathartic, but rarely constructive. I’ve also been on the other end of that enough to know how fucking annoying that is, and one of my saving graces often ends up being my own vanity.
People who deal with depression know that a lot of times it isn’t about being sad so much as it is having a complete lack of feeling about anything, positive or negative. I know it sounds very cornball, but being in nature helps so much for me in that department. I’m a pretty visually oriented person so going to a landscape where nothing in front of my eyes resembles my day-to-day norm (my apartment, Los Angeles, my office, my computer) can throw me off in a good way. Maybe I don’t feel anything about what’s on the Internet that day, but I do feel something about how the ocean sounds. This was so hard when I didn’t have a car because your options are very limited as far as changing your scenery, but I would still get on the 2 bus and take it all the way to the beach and just lie down in the sand for a half an hour if that’s what it took. Sometimes I’d get there and it would be a beautiful, windy day in Malibu, and I’d sit there and I still wouldn’t feel anything, but I’d also be far enough outside my bubble that I could once again feel like roaming creature in the universe. You always have agency, even if it isn’t always over your brain chemistry.
SOPHIE: And is there a sound in the natural world that is scary? Like maybe the sound of someone screaming, or the sound of a dinosaur roaring or something like that?
Kyary Pamyu Pamyu: There are two things. One thing is high school girls laughing like crazy, it scares me because they’re out of their minds! The second is when I hear the sound of them running after me. That’s scary.